The Praising & Shaming of Behaviors

Shame the Behavior, Never the Person

Here’s the deal. Let me give you a quote that will probably offend you at first, and then afterward I think you will be fine with it, because I will have explained it. People will begin behaviors that are praised and stop the behaviors that are shamed. This is a sensitive topic, so stay with me.

We Never Blame People

We never blame people. We blame cultures, behaviors, systems, and processes. But we are very clear about which cultures, behaviors, systems, and processes are right and which ones are wrong.

People are not good or bad. People are inherently good, and they just make choices. The mistake a lot of beliefs have made in the past is associating these things together, saying that a person who does a bad thing must be a bad person. That is not how it works, and if you do not believe me, just give it time. One of these days you will say, you know, Jason was right.

There may be a situation where a person is not a cultural fit, or where they refuse to abandon a behavior because they have attached the awesome person that they are to that behavior. In that case, they will be invited to work elsewhere. But people are not inherently bad.

There Absolutely Are Bad Cultures, Behaviors, Systems, and Processes

I want to be very, very clear about one thing. There are good and bad cultures. There are good and bad behaviors. There are good and bad systems. And there are good and bad processes.

On project sites, I will rail against and demonize bad cultures, behaviors, systems, and processes. I will criticize and shame those things, and I will never shame people.

• A culture where women are treated badly is a bad culture.
• A behavior that puts other people in danger is a bad behavior.
• A system that burns people out, pollutes the environment, creates inequality, takes the investors’ money, or injures the end users is a bad system.
• A process or a schedule that hurts people is a bad process.

I have no reservations about making those distinctions. Shaming people is wrong. Shaming cultures, behaviors, systems, and processes is not wrong. When you make that distinction, people who are inherently good can then clearly choose which one they want to be part of.

How I Praise and How I Call Out

On a jobsite, I will say this behavior is amazing, and that is the only time I will specifically call someone out. I will say Company A did this good behavior on Level 3, Area B, and I want to shout you out and give you a round of applause. I will do that.

Then I will speak to the group without mentioning names. I will say there are some people in this industry who will disrespect you. They will go into the bathrooms and trash them and leave them plugged up. They will leave a mess. They will graffiti the stalls. They will disrespect other people, and they do that because they have a behavior of not respecting people. We do not do that. I do not tolerate that. We are not about that on this jobsite.

Somebody might say that is passive aggressive. So be it, because it works. When I speak that way and target the behavior or the culture, there might be a person or two in the crowd who has that behavior, but not for long. There will be a time when they realize, as the culture shifts, that they had better get on the bus or get off. Getting on the bus means aligning with the acceptable behaviors and cultures, and not aligning with the unacceptable ones.

That is how you shape a culture. It is then clearly their choice. They can elevate to the standard, or they can leave.

Nobody Should Be Able to Hide Below the Line

Here is the key thing I want you to remember. No one should have the slightest bit of ability to endure or hide below the line.

There should be nobody on the project site who feels like they can hide, feels like they cannot be caught, feels like they are hidden, or feels like no one will see that they are dissenting. By virtue of the transparent environment on the project site, and the standards and the culture, they should realize just from being in proximity with others whether they are welcome there or not.

That means the superintendent does not have to send somebody off and be the crazy guy. The superintendent creates such positive reinforcement of the right behaviors, and such demonizing of the wrong behaviors, that when everyone sees the bad behavior, it becomes a self-correcting culture and a self-correcting social group. That is how you do it. There are a lot of things I am not good at, but I am a genius at this. And yes, it has gotten me in trouble before.

The Rules That Keep This From Becoming Toxic

Let me explain what I have learned about how to do this right. This works only as long as it is delivered in a non-toxic environment.

• We never target people or companies, and we never specifically shame a person or a company.
• We never, ever punish people.
• We never accuse or offend.
• We discuss general behaviors and demonize the behavior, so good people can detach themselves from the bad behavior.
• We shout out the right behavior over and over and say, this right here is the measure of success.

People have to be connected, and you have to be an inspirational leader that they want to follow.

Zero Tolerance Out of Respect, Not Punishment

If I have zero tolerance consequences, they will always be out of respect and never about punishment. If somebody is not being safe, and safety is the standard on the project, that is a behavior we do not tolerate. I will invite that worker to leave the project, to go to a safe place, to go home, to get retraining, or to get the supplies they need. I will never do it because I am mad or because I am punishing that person. Ever.

My approach is shaping a culture and winning people over with love. That means being such a good leader, such a good superintendent, so caring, so into the worker, so bought in, and so right about this culture that people want to follow it. It does not mean pointing, accusing, and being mean.

The biggest differentiator is this. Do the workers believe in, buy into, and care about their leader to the point that they will follow him or her?

If your project needs superintendent coaching, project support, or leadership development, Elevate Construction can help your field teams stabilize, schedule, and flow.

So here is the challenge. The next time you address a problem on your jobsite, target the behavior and never the person. Then go shout out the right behavior by name, company, level, and area.

Jason Schroeder said it plainly: “People will begin behaviors that are praised and stop the behaviors that are shamed.”

On we go.

FAQ

What is the difference between shaming a behavior and shaming a person?

People are inherently good and make choices, so we never blame or shame people. Cultures, behaviors, systems, and processes can genuinely be good or bad, and those can be criticized directly, which lets good people detach themselves from a bad behavior.

When does Jason call someone out by name?

Only when praising a good behavior. He will say that a specific company did a good behavior on a specific level and area, and give them a round of applause. Negative examples are always discussed as general behaviors without names.

What does it mean that nobody should be able to hide below the line?

Nobody on the project should feel they can hide, avoid being caught, or dissent unseen. In a transparent environment with clear standards, people recognize from being around others whether they are welcome, which creates a self-correcting culture.

How can zero tolerance be respectful rather than punitive?

If someone is not being safe, they are invited to leave the project to go somewhere safe, go home, get retraining, or get the supplies they need. The action is never taken out of anger or as punishment.